There's nothing quite like football on a Sunday afternoon. There's really nothing else to do, because no one's quite as important as my favorite team. Am I right, or am I right? Well, one of those Sundays a few years ago came with an unexpected bonus: an earth quake. The building began to shake and shimmer. It wasn't the kind of shimmering you see with twerpy guys on Broadway, but between the shaking earth and building and, in contrast, sun, the building actually shimmered. Consequently, I get to say I survived the Earth's rumbles and grumbles - Mother Nature has nothing on me now.
That's why I've come to realize the pip squeak Mama Natural has gone soft on us. Seriously, a "moderate earthquake" ain't going to do nothing to the people of San Francisco. They've seen a few in their day and found earthquakes wanting. Why else would people actually live there, if they'd let pesky 5.6 earth quakes ruin their day? Aftershocks aren't even a test of courage, they're just there so people don't get bored after the "big" quake.
If Mama Natural wants to stay relevant, before all her useless ice bergs melt away, she ought to drop that sucker on a city that's not built to sustain earth quakes. Preferably, a useless, ugly city that no one cares about - like Houston. Texans are supposed to be hardened, crazy sons of bitches, so let's see them deal with that instead of the battle-tested people of San Francisco.
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